Trying not to lose track of what's really important.

As some of you already know, I am a certified Therapy Dog Handler.  Beans, my Therapy Dog, and I spend a lot of our time visiting schools, daycare centers, and nursing homes.  Our goal is always to put a smile on the faces of the people we visit, and to provide calm reassurance to those who need it.

I have a story to tell from my most recent visit to the nursing home that Beans and I have adopted.  There is a patient-resident that lives there, I'll call him Marv, but that's not his real name.  I don't know what Marv's history is, all I know is that he is in a wheelchair, is at least partially paralyzed along one side of his body, and he can't speak.  Despite all his physical issues, I know that Marv's sprit and mind are fully intact.  I can tell this by the animation that he display through his facial expressions, hand gestures, and the grunting sounds that he makes in response to me when I talk to him.  I also know that Marv loves being outside in the sunshine, but, because the staff members at the nursing home are busy taking care of the many other residents, he doesn't get taken outside very often.  When Beans and I visited earlier this week, I asked Marv if he had been outside lately, and he responded with a very sad shake of his head.  I then asked him if he wanted to go outside with me for a while.  I was not prepared for the excitement that exploded across his face when I asked him that question.  I told him that I had several other people to visit, but I would take him outside before I left.

Those of you that know me know that I can talk and talk and talk.  Beans has even figured this out.  When we visit the nursing home, he will stand beside me for a few minutes, but he eventually figures out that we will be in a particular room for quite some time because his mom is chatty.  At this point, he slumps to the floor to enjoy the coolness of the linoleum floor.  That day, I spent an hour and a half talking to the bed-ridden residents.  I can honestly say that I completely forgot about what I had promised Marv, but that promise came rushing back to me when  I entered the hallway to find him waiting for me with an excited expression on his face.  I said to him "Are you ready to go?" , to which he responded with enthusiastic nods, and we were off. 

Marv has a battery powered wheelchair, and he gets around in it very well, but it is a very slow mode of transportation.  In the thirty minutes or so that Marv, Beans and I were outside together, we probably didn't cover much more than a quarter of a mile, but the distance was not important.  What was important to Marv was that he was outside for the first time in weeks, feeling the sun and wind on his face.  The almost rapture on his face as he slowly made his way down the sidewalk in front of the nursing home was a joy to behold.  When we headed back into the building, and I told him that Beans and I had to go, he tried his best to communicate with me through hand gestures, smiles and grunts.  I don't know exactly what he was trying to say, I'm still learning how to read him, but I'm sure that he was saying thank you.  I walked out of the nursing home that day feeling better than I had in a long time, because Beans and I had made a difference in someone's life.

I ran for office of Vice President in my Therapy Dog group last July, and was elected.  I have been working ever since to try to make the group better.  In the meantime, other members of the group that could not accept the fact that they lost the election, have taken the group away from it's true mission in life by introducing drama and conflict into everything we try to do.  I have come to realize that these people are truly unhappy people, and that they  believe that if they're not happy, then nobody else should be happy.  I am not proud to admit that these people have dragged me down with them at times, causing me to doubt myself and my good intentions.  I am done letting the negative people affect me.  My experience in the nursing home with Marv, and with several other residents has taught me that the interaction that Beans and I have with them is valuable, and the negative people can't take that away from me.  So, starting today, I'm going to shrug off any attempts by the unhappy people to bring me down, and keep my eye on what's really important here.  If I ever seem to be down about the political stuff that is going on in my organization, and you see it, please remind me of why I'm doing what I'm doing.  It's hard to be down and out when you think about the difference Beans and I are making in people's lives, and that's what's really important.

Our Children's childhood is slipping away.

I'm afraid that our children are, in an attempt to be older faster, forsaking their childhoods in favor of what they consider to be more appealing and adult behaviors.  In the age of facebook, cellphones, texting and dating, children are no longer pursuing the activities that are age appropriate.  Instead of playing outside, doing craft projects, reading books and playing sports, many children have settled into a routine consisting mostly of Facebook posts, hundreds of texts, and endless mind-rotting reality tv shows that were never meant for their age group.  As a result, they are adopting behaviors that were never meant to be adopted by children their age. 

At a recent evening activity at my daughter's school, I was astounded at the number of ten and eleven year old kids  that sat in the corners of the room, not actually communicating with the kids around them, but with their noses stuck in their cell phones.  Instead of relishing the opportunity to physically hang out with friends, play games, and have a great time, they decided that it was more important to text people that weren't there, or surf the web for more brainless stimulation.  Sadly, many of my daughter's friends or former ones can no longer carry out a real conversation unless it is conducted via facebook or cell phone text.  At a recent activity, another child told my daughter "I feel sorry for you because you don't have a cell phone".  My daughter handled it beautifully, simply replying "Don't feel sorry for me, I don't need or want a cell phone".  Good for her.  I don't dislike cell phones.  What I do dislike is the flood of bad behavior that having one has seemed to cause in our culture. 

Boys and girls my daughter's age are now "dating".  I would be perfectly willing to write this off as innocent behavior, except for the bad behavior that has sprung up out of it.  While still in the minority, the fifth grade students that are "dating", are now trying to make the kids that are not dating feel like there is something wrong with them.  Along with dating has come gossiping about who is dating whom, inappropriate physical contact, and suggestive comments being passed between students.  My daughter was recently called a "Fag" at school by another student that had heard thru the grapevine that my daughter had been gossiping about her.  This same student called another female student a "whore" for a similar perceived offense. I refuse to believe that these two slurs are a normal part of a fifth grader's vocabulary.  In their attempts to be more grown up, some of our children are hanging out with kids older than they are, and adopting their language and behaviors, good or bad, in order to appear cool in the eyes of the older kids.  What starts today as merely bad language can quite possibly lead to alcohol and drug consumption, sexual activity at a young age, and a host of other bad behaviors.

As a parent, it is my responsibility to monitor my children and their activities and behaviors.  It is also my responsibility to teach them good values, and to teach them to become individuals with their own thoughts and opinions, in the hope that they will form their own opinions instead of just following those of the currently popular crowd.  Sadly, there are parents out there that aren't as vigilant with their children.

I am constantly telling my children that they should cherish their childhood years, because they don't last forever.  They have plenty of time to grow up and take on more adult behavior when they are actually older and more adult.  I hope that they are listening.